岁末年初,又到了送礼的时节。送礼也是一门学问,送得好可以增进感情,送得不好则会让对方内心不快。
如何才能送礼送到心坎里呢?来看看专家们给出的建议。
01
不要纠结价格
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Should you just splurge to show how much you care?
你该不该多花点钱来证明你有多在乎呢?
splurge[splɜːrdʒ]:v. 挥霍
Research has actually shown that spending more does not always guarantee a well-received gift. One study found that the more expensive a gift, the more givers expected recipients to reciate it. But while givers thought spending more conveyed more thoughtfulness, receivers didn’t associate the price with their level of reciation.
事实上,研究显示,多花钱不总是能保证你买到受欢迎的礼物。一项研究发现,礼物越贵重,送礼者就越期待收礼者感激。然而,尽管送礼者认为,钱花得更多意味着礼物更有心,收礼者对礼物的喜欢程度却不与价格挂钩。
"It seems pretty intuitive that if you spend more, you’re going to get a better gift. It turns out that there’s no evidence that recipients are sensitive to the cost of a gift when they figure out how much they’re going to enjoy that gift,” says Jeff Galak, an associate professor of marketing at the Carnegie Mellon Tepper School of Business in the US city of Pittsburgh.
美国匹兹堡市的卡耐基梅隆大学泰珀商学院营销学副教授杰夫·盖拉克说:“你花更多钱,就能买到更好的礼物,这似乎是人们下意识的想法。实际上并没有证据表明,收礼者对礼物的喜欢程度和价格有关。”
02
目光放长远些
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Galak says the trick for giving a great gift is to think past the fleeting moment of actually handing it over.
盖拉克说,送对礼物的诀窍在于,不要只想到送礼的瞬间,要把目光放长远些。
"When givers give gifts, they’re trying to optimise on the moment they give the gift and see the smile on the recipient’s face right in that moment,” says Galak. “But what recipients care about is how much value they’re going to derive from that over a longer time period.”
盖拉克说:“送礼人在选购礼物时,为了看到收礼者脸上的笑容会很重视送礼瞬间。但是收礼者在乎的是长远来看自己能从礼物中得到多少价值。”
In other words, it might not be exciting to watch a friend or family member open the gift of a movie-streaming subscription, so you might be less likely to give one. But a recipient may actually love it, since it’s a gift that can be enjoyed often over time.
换言之,也许亲友在打开流媒体订阅礼物时不会有令人兴奋的开心表情,因此你也不太可能送这种礼物。然而收礼者或许会喜欢这件礼物,因为它是可以在日后经常享用的礼物。
03
礼物无需独特
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Galak also suggests not getting hung up on giving the most unique gift out there. Sometimes something that many people desire or many others have can be exactly what someone wants.
盖拉克还指出,不要一心只想送独一无二的礼物。有时候许多人想要的东西或者许多其他人拥有的东西也许正是某人想要的礼物。
One study showed that we tend to focus on a recipient’s unique traits and personality as we shop for them. But this hyper-specificity leads us to ignore other aspects of their wants and needs, which may make us buy them an inferior gift. We also tend to want to buy different gifts for multiple people, even if they might all be hier with the same thing – and might never compare gifts at all.
一项研究显示,我们在选购礼物时,往往会关注收礼者的个性。但是这种高度特异性让我们忽略了他们其他方面的需求,这也许会导致最后送出的礼物不那么令人满意。我们也倾向于为多个人买不同的礼物,即使他们可能都喜欢同样的东西——而且也许永远不会互相比较。
In order to feel like a good gift giver, people erroneously feel like they need to diversify the gifts, even at the cost of giving the best present, according to Galak. You might also overlook buying something that you own because you don’t want to undermine your own sense of individuality.
盖拉克说,为了做到“尽善尽美”,人们错误地认为自己需要送出多样化的礼物,即便代价是放弃最佳礼物。你在选购礼物时可能也会跳过自己拥有的东西,因为你不想有损自己的个性。
undermine [ˌʌndərˈmaɪn]:vt. 破坏,渐渐破坏
So those trainers of yours that your friend loves? Don’t avoid gifting a matching pair just because you want to be unique.
因此如果你朋友喜欢你的那双运动鞋,就不要为了自己想要的独一无二而故意不买同款鞋当礼物。
04
基于共同的爱好选购礼物
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To shop better, Elizabeth Dunn, a psychology professor at the University of British Columbia in Canada and co-author ofHy Money, suggests starting with something you have in common with the recipient. She says, you should focus on what you share and pick a gift from there.
加拿大英属哥伦比亚大学心理学教授、《快乐金钱》合著者伊丽莎白·邓恩说,为了选购到更好的礼物,你可以先从你和收礼者的共同点着手。她说,你应该基于你们的共同点来挑礼物。
For an even stronger gift think about a common interest you share and buy something that your recipient can experience – say, concert tickets or a cooking class. Research has also shown that experiential gifts can bring you and the recipient closer, even if you don’t experience the gift with your recipient.
如果你想送更好的礼物,你可以想想两个人共同的兴趣是什么,然后据此购买体验式礼物,比如音乐会门票或烹饪课。研究还显示,体验式礼物能让你和收礼者的心靠得更近,即使你没有和收礼者一起体验这份礼物。
05
问对方想要什么礼物
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If you have nothing in common, though, Dunn recommends just asking the recipient what they want. In fact, research shows that people are more reciative of gifts they ask for than ones they don’t.
如果你和收礼者毫无共同点,邓恩建议你直接问收礼者想要什么。事实上,研究表明,人们收到自己指定的礼物会更感激。
"People want to be creative and surprise the recipient,” says Dunn, “but the better gift will be whatever it is they say they want.”
邓恩说:“人们想用创意礼物给收礼者一个惊喜,但更好的礼物是对方自己想要的礼物。”
Galak agrees that the simplest way to make a person hy with a gift is asking them what they want. It’s not an answer most people like, he says, because good gifts are supposed to be a ‘surprise’ – even though science has disproven this.
盖拉克同意,让一个人开心的最简单的送礼方式就是问对方想要什么。他说,这不是多数人喜欢的答案,因为人们想当然地认为好礼物应该是个“惊喜”,尽管科学已经证明事实并非如此。
"Asking somebody what they want is seen as taboo. And that’s a shame,” he says. “We would all be better off if we gave people what they want.”
他说:“问别人想要什么礼物被视为禁忌。这很可惜。如果我们送的是对方指定的礼物,大家都会更开心。”